The Fantastic Fables of the Fire Ferret!
by Jeff Morris
Summary: Bolin discovers that the bedtime stories he's been making up for his kids have a much wider audience than he could ever imagine.


_This is an amateur, non-commercial story, which is not produced, approved of, or in any way sponsored by the holders of the trademarks/copyrights from which this work is derived, nor is it intended to infringe on the rights of these holders. And so it goes. _

"…and so Pabu made a big leap and managed to push the door open, so the Air Master and his friends could leave the Spirit World in time for supper." Bolin clapped his hands and rose to his feet. "Okay, that's enough for tonight, kids. Time to go to sleep."

"One more, daddy! One more!" Jade sat up in bed and used her usually-effective "big green eyes" attack, but it was hard to do when the yawns kept interrupting. Nearby her twin brother Sen had long since surrendered to the Sandman. "Can Pabu sleep with us tonight?"

"Sure, if he wants to." The fire ferret jumped off his shoulder and quickly nestled around the sleepy girl's chest. "Okay, sweetie. Good dreams." Bolin switched off the lights and gently shut the bedroom door. Opal was standing there smiling at him.

"You," she said firmly, "are the most wonderful father." She kissed his cheek.

"Aww, I just make 'em up as I go. It's no big deal," Bolin said as they walked arm in arm toward the family room. To his surprise, however, quite the crowd was waiting for him. "Uhh…hi?"

"Hey, kid!" Varrick appeared out of nowhere, slapping him hard on the shoulder. "Great work! I gotta say, you've got a real gift going here! This is going to be the next big thing everywhere!" He handed Bolin a large illustrated book.

"Pabu…and His Adventures…in the Spirit World?" Bolin read the title slowly, trying to figure out what was going on. "What is this?"

"Well…" Opal smiled. "Mother overheard you telling the twins your stories a while back and she arranged to have them all recorded and transcribed. And everyone she showed them to loved them, so she asked Huan to illustrate them…"

"Hmmph."

"…but when he wouldn't do them, she found someone else who would and she had them made into a book. And somehow Varrick got wind of it…"

"No kidding! Man, Zhu Li loved this book so much she wished she had kids to read it to, so we did the thing!" A very pregnant Zhu Li, seated in one of the oversized chairs, gave him a wave. "And the more we talked about it, I realized man! We could go places with this! Stuffed animals! T-shirts! Funny hats! And…" He wrapped Bolin in a headlock and pulled him close. "MOVERS."

"Movers?" Bolin squeaked.

"Yeah! It's great! I went out and found a bunch of guys from the Fire Nation who could do the animation on the cheap, hired someone to do the narration, and then…THEN…I read the one about poor Pabu getting stuck in the teapot right before the Avatar's party, and it hit me—why not mix LIVE-ACTION with the cartoons? Here, sit down kid—you're going to love this! Zhu Li…" Varrick looked around, then laughed. "Never mind, Zhu Li, this time I'll do the thing!" The lights dimmed and he started the projector.

The first few minutes followed "the plot"—kindly Uncle Iroh was preparing a big celebration for the Avatar, no one would let poor Pabu help because he always got into trouble, the fire ferret tried to clean up the brand new giant teapot Iroh had found for the occasion but got trapped inside… "And here comes the Avatar!" Varrick proudly announced.

"Wait," Bolin said, puzzled. "Isn't that Ginger? And I didn't have Asami in that story…"

"I've got Ginger on contract, gotta give her something to do! And Asami is a great addition, promotes inclusion and love in all its forms! Teaches the kids tolerance and acceptance! Win-win!"

"….have they seen this yet?" Bolin asked in a small voice.

The "Avatar" offered to help by taking the big pot down to the river, she and "Asami" struggled to open the lid, Pabu popped up suddenly and the two women fell backwards into the river, emerging with their soaked clothes clinging tightly against the bodies.

"This was a kids' story," Bolin protested.

"Listen, kid, if the dads are going to get stuck taking the kids to the movers, you gotta give them something to make it worth their time, you know? Let me tell you, that wasn't an easy shot, either—took us six takes till we got it right!"

"I'll bet."

Mercifully, the story concluded—the Avatar, Asami and Pabu brought the now-full teapot back, the party was a huge success, and Iroh gave Pabu two big pieces of cake for being a big help. "And close," Varrick said, flicking the projector off and the lights on. "Whattya think, kid? This is going fly like sky bison in heat! And with the book coming out, we've got enough material for at least six sequels! Kid, I knew you had greatness in you from the beginning, but you just keep raising the bar!"

Bolin bowed his head. "I don't know," he said slowly. "I only did these things because the kids loved it, and it just doesn't feel right to do this, especially without Asami and Korra's permission…"

"If it makes you feel better," Su assured him, "we got their permission in exchange for participation investment."

"Man, I tell you, that Asami drives a hard bargain! She didn't quit until I agreed to cut her in for twenty percent!" Varrick fell back against the sofa cushions. "And I didn't think she'd want a cut of the estimated gross…"

"Bolin," Opal said gently, taking his hand. "Think of all the parents who will be reading your stories to their children…maybe someday soon Korra and Asami will be reading them to their kids. You're going to make a lot of people so happy."

"And us so rich!" Varrick declared before Zhu Li kicked him in the knee.

"Well…."

"I don't understand why you're so upset!" said Tenzin as he escorted his family out of the crowded theater. "I'm sorry—the movie was so juvenile, I fell asleep…"

"Oh, but you certainly woke up when those two women came out of the water!" Pema growled. "You couldn't stop staring!"

"I was just surprised Korra and Asami would approve that…" Tenzin pleaded to no avail.

Before he could further dig himself out of (or deeper into) the hole he currently resided in, Ikki came bounding up to him, dragging her poor brother Rohan behind her. "Dad! Dad! Dad! Can I have a Pabu the Fire Ferret T-shirt? And a Pabu the Fire Ferret Cap? And a Pabu the Fire Ferret poster for my room? And oh yeah, I think Rohan wants the Pabu the Fire Ferret doll, and some of the Pabu the Fire Ferret stickers, and…"

Tenzin turned to find his wife at the merchandise counter. "What are you doing?" he demanded. "Surely you're not…"

Pema returned with a hardcover copy of "Pabu and His Adventures in the Spirit World". "Oh yes I am," she declared, slapping the book firmly into his chest. "And I'm sure you'll be getting to know the stories very well over the next two months, because I'm sure Ikki and especially Rohan will want you to read each one to them every single night! And perhaps while you're at it you can find the part where those two nubile girls fall into the river!"

"But…Pema…" Tenzin sighed; she was already storming toward the waiting Oogi, their children in tow. He looked down at his son Meelo, who gave him a sympathetic pat on the back.

"Well, dad, that's show biz!"


End file.
